Monday, February 23, 2009

i'm having issues

this is nothing like my usual issues that have something to do with boy drama or some shit like that, this is a bit more extreme. i went to school friday morning thinking that everything was going to be fine i had three classes and the first part of a career workshop so i knew i wasn't gonna get home till like 5:30 or 6. so i got home and i was gonna go to dinner with my friends, but i needed to drop my stuff off at my room first and Anna, one of my suitemates, told me that Bethany, my other suitemate, was in the hospital for alcohol poisoning and she asked me if we could go visit her the next day, i had the second part of the career workshop and a choir thing the next day, but i told her that i would e-mail my teacher to see if i could go late so i did and went to dinner with my friends and told them what happened, so we were at dinner and one of the RAs, who is one of Bethany's best friends, came up to me and asked if i had heard about Bethany and i said "yeah, Anna just told me" so Alex, the RA said that they thought that Bethany was dead since her BAC was somewhere around .43% (and most people are dead before .40%) or something and i later found out that her breathing rate was 5 per minute when if your breathing rate is 6 or less per minute, you're basically dead. so when i heard that i freaked out, like, i'm a natural worryer, i worry over the stupidest shit there is so this really had me freaked out, Erin, one of my friends who is also an EMT said "oh, she'll be fine" and i KNEW that she'd be okay, but i'm basicially a mother so if there is a problem, i have to fix it, and there was a problem and i COULDN'T fix it, so yeah, i was freaking out. but i went on with life as normal and did the thing the next day and Anna texted me the next day to see when i could go visit Bethany, and i said well i'm in this thing till 3:30 but i talked to my choir teacher and he said it was okay to show up late, so she texted back and said, "oh, nevermind, she's coming home today" so i did the rest of my shit for that day and then i didn't actually see her till Sunday and i want to talk to her about it and everything, like, i just want to let her know that she had me worried and that i care about her, but she has so many people talking to her about it that i'm sure she is tired of it, so i think i'm just gonna treat her like nothing happened, which is what i think she needs, *sigh* i don't know, it was a stressful weekend