I think I'll try defying gravity, and you can't pull me down!

in case you couldn't tell i'm really hyper and happy, for a few reasons actually, the main one is i spent the ENTIRE WEEKEND doing lindy hop social dancing and it was EPIC!!!!(if you don't know what lindy is, here, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=myJj0mNNe1Y) and they guy i like was there *grins* (and if you know me, like i've been talking to you about it *cough*ellen*cough* you know who it is) it was awesome, it was SOOOOOOOOO much fun, i learned so much more in those three days than i did in like 3 weeks of lindy lessson (sorry evan, but i learn more social dancing) i do believe that lindy is my new favorite dance, yes, that's right, i'm addicted to a dance that is so fast and upbeat that it makes it hard for me to breath sometimes, and no i don't know aerials yet (like jumps and flips, evan even chastised me for not doing a silly pose at the end of our dance, but i was so tired i was afraid i would collapse) and this is how crazy evan is (he's the Monday night lindy teacher)there was a guy in class last night who got his shimmies and his triple steps mixed up (yes, it actually happened) he thought a shimmy was a triple step (and yes i was dancing with this guy at the time, to be fair, he was new) and we were doing something where the girls spin out and the guys just kinda stay there and this guy went "do the guys shimmy when the girls spin?" and evan started cracking up and his face lit up and was like "SURE" and proceeded to demonstrate and becky, the female teacher, kinda sighed and looked at my partner and said "thank you, now he's gonna do that from now on" then evan shimmied again and collapsed on the floor in a fit of laughter and my partner was like "oh, that's a shimmy?" and we all erupted in laughter (well more than we already were) and nodded and the few of us that could catch our breath said "yes, THAT is a shimmy" and he said "i thought THIS was a shimmy" and proceeded to triple step and evan said, THAT is a triple step" it was a great moment and earlier josh had to follow since we were lead heavy, but josh can follow, so there was a huge conversation about that and evan comes out with "josh swings both ways, he leads AND follows" and we all started cracking up cause it is a swing class (haha he swings? nvm) and josh looked like he was about to say something in rebuttal and finally came out with "that...that was clever" in the tone of voice that said "that was too clever to be mad at" it was a great class, i'm glad i went

hmmm, i've been ranting on for so long that i can't remember what the original intention of this post was, or even if i've deviated, oh well, i'll be done now, i'm gonna go be bored out of my mind doing something else

SPRING BREAK

i am OFFICIALLY on spring break!! well TECHNICALLY spring break started on Friday when i got out of class, but i didn't leave chico till Saturday at like 1 pm. so far it is going great! friday night i hung out with friends till like 3 or 3:30, i love those nights that you lose track of time just hanging out and having a blast. oh and we watched Phantom of the Opera, which was actually the guys' idea, yeah seriously, i love these guys, they are total geeks, and to their credit we did watch a couple of episodes of "Firefly" before Phantom. over half of the shit they were talking about went right over my head, but i still had fun hanging out with all of them. so yeah i woke up and drove Sami to her boyfriend's house and then i left to come HOME!! it is great to be home, but i didn't really get a real break till today since today is the first day i've been home that i didn't spend at my aunt's new house helping her move and get things ready to actually live there! but i've been having fun since my aunt is so incredibly awesome and insane! but i guess the insane comes with being in the family. and today i was going to spend the day hanging out at the high school but i kinda lost track of time and i don't want to bother people at Fiddler rehearsals since opening night is Friday and i know from experience that Mrs. Martin and Mrs. McElroy will be on edge and insane and ready to bite anyone's head off that inhibits productivity so yeah, i skipped out on that, i THINK band is tomorrow morning so i'll probably go to that, and even if it is choir, i'll still go, i'm trying to remember the High School's schedule, and it is BARELY working. ANYWAY, i think this week is going to be fun, especially this weekEND, since i'm going Sacramento Lindy Exchange (SLX, why "x" stands for Exchange, idk so don't ask) yeah i'm all excited for that, three days of full on lindy hopping!! lindy is a recent skill i've acquired, so i'm not very good, but i want to get better! yeah basically my spring break is full of fun (and not so much fun) things to do, and it's only half over! i'm excited now, the only thing that i wish were different was that i wish that i got to hang out with my friends more, hmmm, i might try and get a hold of some of them, but idk if it will work out that way. oh well, what happens, happens, right?

i'm having issues

this is nothing like my usual issues that have something to do with boy drama or some shit like that, this is a bit more extreme. i went to school friday morning thinking that everything was going to be fine i had three classes and the first part of a career workshop so i knew i wasn't gonna get home till like 5:30 or 6. so i got home and i was gonna go to dinner with my friends, but i needed to drop my stuff off at my room first and Anna, one of my suitemates, told me that Bethany, my other suitemate, was in the hospital for alcohol poisoning and she asked me if we could go visit her the next day, i had the second part of the career workshop and a choir thing the next day, but i told her that i would e-mail my teacher to see if i could go late so i did and went to dinner with my friends and told them what happened, so we were at dinner and one of the RAs, who is one of Bethany's best friends, came up to me and asked if i had heard about Bethany and i said "yeah, Anna just told me" so Alex, the RA said that they thought that Bethany was dead since her BAC was somewhere around .43% (and most people are dead before .40%) or something and i later found out that her breathing rate was 5 per minute when if your breathing rate is 6 or less per minute, you're basically dead. so when i heard that i freaked out, like, i'm a natural worryer, i worry over the stupidest shit there is so this really had me freaked out, Erin, one of my friends who is also an EMT said "oh, she'll be fine" and i KNEW that she'd be okay, but i'm basicially a mother so if there is a problem, i have to fix it, and there was a problem and i COULDN'T fix it, so yeah, i was freaking out. but i went on with life as normal and did the thing the next day and Anna texted me the next day to see when i could go visit Bethany, and i said well i'm in this thing till 3:30 but i talked to my choir teacher and he said it was okay to show up late, so she texted back and said, "oh, nevermind, she's coming home today" so i did the rest of my shit for that day and then i didn't actually see her till Sunday and i want to talk to her about it and everything, like, i just want to let her know that she had me worried and that i care about her, but she has so many people talking to her about it that i'm sure she is tired of it, so i think i'm just gonna treat her like nothing happened, which is what i think she needs, *sigh* i don't know, it was a stressful weekend

thank god for wake up calls

so you guys remember that boy issue i had a while back, so i was the saddest excuse for a human ever, cause over 3 months later, i still wasn't over him, and i was talking to him via myspace and he called me melissa! hello? how do you forget someone's name when you had THREE classes with them, AND they told you that they had a MAJOR crush on you? for some STRANGE reason i would think that that would stick in your memory! just a little bit! so i've decided that if he can't even remember my name after all this time, that he is SOOOOOOOOO not worth my time! like i said, THANK GOD FOR WAKE UP CALLS, and all i can say is that IT'S ABOUT FREAKING TIME, ok i'm done

for your information

i have another blog, i will still be posting on this one for everyday stuff, or just random updates, but the other one will be used for stories, lyrics, or anything creative that pops into my head, so i just wanted to let all y'all know and give you guys the link, if you care to check it out occasionally, so the link is http://daringdancer.wordpress.com thanks for caring! (if you do that is)

i keep wanting to think of really thought provoking titles,and fail

i love acting, and singing, and dancing, and you would think "oh, that's a great combination for broadway stars, you should do that if you love those things so much" and you would be right, if i were good at any of those things, i LOVE performing, even though i get HORRIBLE stage fright, and i can deal with it when i'm acting, because i'm not ME, i'm someone else, but when i'm singing, i AM me, and everyone knows i'm me, everyone knows that music is my life, so its hard to pretend to be someone else, and when i dance, well i dance ballroom, so for me, its just me and my partner, no one else, so i don't get as nervous, and when i did ensemble dancing, i didn't worry about it, till afterward, if that makes sense, i'm very self conscious, but usually only after the fact, because i know i'm not skinny, and i don't have the best posture, and stuff like that, hmmm, i have digressed again, i was going to talk about how much i love theatre and how much i love acting and stuff like that, well i guess i will just start over from here, haha. ANYWAY, i LOVE acting, when you completely NAIL a performance, it is the BEST feeling in the world, at least to me it is, it's like a natural high and it makes me so happy, NOTHING can bring me down. but i'm not very good, i've auditioned for plays and musicals, and for plays i don't usually get a part (unless it is in a drama class) and for musicals, i've always been ensemble, in the last musical i was in (West Side Story) i was ensemble, but it was the half of the ensemble that didn't sing, yes that's right, i was a Jet Girl, this was one of the only times in my life i was frustrated at my ethnicity, WHY did i have to be scottish? i just HAD to be one of the whitest girls in the production, and what made it worse, was there was a guy that is whiter than i am and was a shark, tell me how that makes sense? (sorry i have digressed...AGAIN, haha) anyway, i love acting, and being up on stage is the best feeling in the world, and i'd love to do it as a career, but that isn't exactly a stable industry, and i'm not good enough to make a career out of it, *sigh* maybe some day

hmmmm

its curious isn't it? how we (well at least i) can feel happy, ecstatic even, i feel like dancing and singing and bouncing, i feel happy and giggly, i want to laugh out loud and just be loud and crazy and happy, but i also feel like crying my fucking eyes out. i have a vague idea where the crying feeling is coming from, and i KNOW that i need to get over him, and that whole thing that happened. i mean JEEZ its been 2 MONTHS, i should totally be over this, but i can't, usually i'm a fighter, if someone breaks my heart, i suck it up and move on, and yeah i've tried to do that, and i have, to a point, but usually after 2 months my heart doesn't ache anymore, but this time it's different, and this is also the first time i've ever liked a guy with a girlfriend, well first time to my knowledge, and true in my defense i didn't know that he had a gf when i told him that i liked him, and usually if i find something like that out, then my i back off, immediately, and then my feelings fade relatively quickly, i'm not one to fall for someone else's guy, but this time its different...................ok this was SO not the point of this blog, but w/e, i tend to let my mind go crazy in these things and the focus tends to shift, hahaha, well that's me i guess, lol